A pretty good reminder not to take important advice from reddit
I guess this is reflected in the real world how we are, especially politically
We don’t talk to those that don’t agree, we spend hours in echo chamber type forums, and left or right, we get more extreme in our opinions, we believe dumb shit.
This hit the right side of things especially hard, I guess because it’s susceptible to this by design, focusing on the loners, the angry, the disenfranchised. Make them listen even less, make them even more extreme and you get terrorists.
Tbf, this is in line with more and more bot accounts posting ridiculous situations for engagement
That’s essentially what it is. Bot accounts posting ridiculous stories and bot accounts replying to those stories to farm karma. With bots and unaware humans upvoting it all.
Any time I investigated an account for bot activity, one of the big red flags was comment history within relationship advice subs.
My (21f) husband (54m) makes me pay for everything despite him not allowing me to get a job and him being a millionaire, he also doesn’t let me have any friends or speak to my family and has been cheating on me with his secretary for 5 years, WIBTA if I asked him to stop calling me a useless whore?
I read it as “farma karma” and it works.
“Tl;dr my wife cheated on me with both my brothers, and literally beat my dementia ridden father to death with a baseball bat in front of my children because he said he approved of gay marriage, i told her to “cool her jets” and now she wont talk to me, im beginning to have second thoughts on our relationship, AITAH???”
I have a really great husband but he rapes and murders people all the time. He’s a wonderful father to our kids, and a good provider, and helps out around the house a lot, but I’m struggling to cope with all the murderrape. What should I do?
To be fair, a lot of those have to do with cult 47 too, which a lot of people are dealing with abusive family members. There is no talking to those people, all they do is provoke.
If that’s a true situation, yeah, leaving is the right call.
I’m curious what this would look like split out into 2 different graphs based on the OP’s gender
How can we say its bad advice to break the relationship?
How can we know that? There are many humans that are absolutely horrible in a relationship and you should not “work” on those, you should drop them before you get even more hurt.
TIL: Dont compromise, dont communicate and do NOT give people space.
Escalation is the only solution!!!
I asked my husband to do more chores during the week and he said he’s too tired from his 12 hour shifts at work.
“Divorce him right now, he clearly doesn’t respect you as a human being and is definitely cheating with you with someone from work”
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Completely the opposite in my experience. And I’ve even seen it where peopleb repost a story but with the genders flipped and Reddit generally sides with the woman both times
Those relationship subs are majority women
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Never give up, never surrender!
NTA, your graph your rules. Also, he dropped these: 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
As the saying goes: Delete facebook, hit the gym, lawyer up.
Delete the gym, hit the lawyer, get a facebook
While bots seem like the obvious answer, there’s also a possibility of demographic shift over time towards a younger and more mainstream commenting/posting population. More young adults with no baggage asking for advice means cutting ties is more likely to be a novel suggestion for them and has less friction, and more young adults (and, frankly, kids) in the commenting population means less nuance, more “edge”, and generally more advocating for hot-takes that have attracted upvotes in the past.
Probably also related to engagement. More people click on a horror story. It’s easy to draft something thats massive red flags and then be like “uh oh but i dont know what to do” and then farm comments and upvotes. Bots probably post these all the time.
Hell most relationships that go bad need to end. No reason to stay with someone and drag out bullshit when you have billions on the planet.
And i’m not talking about “my partner likes onions on his burger and I can’t stand the smell, should I break up with them?”.
Definitely some bias here.
Nobody posts “My wife and I love each other very much and we are very happy. What should we do about it?”
So, most of these situations aren’t good to begin with, and typically when there’s a dispute, people tend to paint the other person in a much more negative light. Often in the case of “He did this for NO REASON!” usually there is a reason we don’t know about, and commenters might be more willing to suggest staying together if they knew what that reason was.
Why would the bias change over time, though? That would exist from 2010.
I had the same thought as you, but there are perhaps other factors which could contribute to this too.
We see the chart and assume the shift is due to more negative bias in how people respond, but it could also be due to a change in how people post.
For one, the demographics of reddit would have slowly changed over time, from largely a bunch of nerds in 2010 when reddit was niche, to a more general cross-section of society as reddit became closer to mainstream social media.
This (among other factors) may have brought with it a shift in motivations from people genuinely seeking advice (and therefore posting truthful stories) to people seeking validation and a cathartic dose of upvotes (and therefore posting highly biased stories which favour themselves, and paint their partner in a terrible light)
Now, I don’t think that explains all of it. I do feel on a purely personal and qualitative basis that the Internet in general has certainly become more toxic over the past decade, and that people are more angry and hostile now. But I don’t think it’s necessarily a single-factor cause.
People started caring more and more about karma, so they (and bots) make more bs posts that attract attention. More people click and read about the most obvious red flags than they do about a little issue someone genuinely needed advice with.
Good point. I was thinking more of the “Why is break up the number one answer?” than “Why are we saying break up more often than we used to?”
Regarding that, I’m with the other commenter who suggested karma farmers coming up with more exaggerated situations.
You are likely right about that. Even in 2010 it was not a destination for happy relationships.
And it does make me ponder relationship culture shifts over the last 15 years.
People spending way too much time together during lockdown? Not sure…
If that was true then the trend should be fairly flat over time.
