This is the best summary I could come up with:
The type of cancer has not been revealed, but according to a palace statement the King began “regular treatments” on Monday.
Buckingham Palace says the King “remains wholly positive about his treatment and looks forward to returning to full public duty as soon as possible”.
He will postpone his public engagements and it is expected other senior royals will help to stand in for him during his treatment.
The King, 75, returned to London from Sandringham in Norfolk on Monday morning and the palace says he has commenced treatment as an outpatient.
Although he will pause his public events, the King will continue with his constitutional role as head of state, including paperwork and private meetings.
UK figures suggest, on average each year, more than a third (36%) of new cancer cases were in people aged 75 and over.
The original article contains 280 words, the summary contains 139 words. Saved 50%. I’m a bot and I’m open source!
Never mind the cancer. That old building speaks?!
With as much as the White House and Number 10 speak, this surprises you?
If that building could talk it would say some incredibly disturbing things.
Centuries-long blood ritual
Oh man, he only just got his dream job.
Nah, he was doing his dream job the whole time, running a research farm and advocating for sustainable farming practices. Soon as he became king, he had to stop with the targeted advocacy.
he also advocated for homoeopathy…maybe that’s what he’ll treat his cancer with (i hope so)
I recently got the side-eye from a lot of people because I said that homeopathy is not the same as natural remedies.
What’s unnatural about water?
It’s not that there’s anything unnatural about water. It’s just not a remedy for anything but dehydration.
Ah the Steve Jobs treatment method, maybe he’ll adopt the fruit diet. Shame Harry gave up his claim, he seemed like the one with Lizzie’s spirit
Abolish the monarchy!
With the UK’s Chief Executive and thought leader incapacitated Scotland should declare independence.
Issue is, I do not think they are going for a Scottish Republic unfortunately.
Darn, I was hoping for a car crash
So, Harry is next in line, right?
/s
I’m just fucking.
Our royalty are really just diplomats with better PR and a lot less privacy. Poor guy just lost his mum, now he’s got cancer - I hope he recovers.
I hope he makes a full recovery, but you know, the jokes write themselves.
Now is the time for Scotland and Wales to declare independence and join the EU. It would be hilarious.
He will receive better healthcare than 99% of the population after living a life drenched in privilege.
My sympathies lie elsewhere
You know sympathy isn’t rationed, right?
Yes, he’s lined in unbelievable privilege. Yes, he’ll get the best care available. Yes, it is reasonable to believe and campaign for the monarchy to be abolished.
But this is still a man who has been diagnosed with cancer. For anyone, that is a scary and upsetting diagnosis and, upon hearing about it, it is only reasonable to feel sympathy for that person.
Don’t even bother. No one here cares. They want him and his entire family to die horribly.
I mean, I also feel sympathy for you.
There is a lot of hate there, and someone/something must have really hurt you to make you feel that someone deserves cancer because they’ve had money in their life.
I hope whatever you’re going through gets better, that whatever has happened in the past becomes more distant, and that today is a lucky day for you.
It’s a bit harsh to put such words in their mouth. They said their sympathies lie elsewhere, not that he deserved it.
Becomes king
Fucking dies
Lmaooo
English taxpayers paying for another coronation ceremony be like: 🥶*
* can’t pay to heat their house.
Don’t knock it, we get a day off when they die and a day off when we get a new one.
Sometimes we get a day off when they’ve been on the throne for a set number of years.
So for that reason I’d like to keep them.
Give us two extra bank holidays a year, and you can King Ralph all these motherfuckers.
I mean, it did bring more money into the economy than it took out of it, same with Queen Elizabeth II’s funeral, so we could profit off of this
And least he got to be king first :P
I haven’t seen any new coins yet with his face on it. It may be the shortest run of coins with a new face. I’ve had the same face on my coins for my entire life, these will be the first with a new one.
Shortest run was probably Edward VIII. My dad found a coin with Charles’s face on it. I also bought a few commemoratives. I think it’ll probably start appearing on £1 coins soon as they are the newest
I can’t wait to be smoking on that king pack. #RipBozo meme is locked and loaded.
It’s a bummer that his reign may not last long enough for the British to decide that maybe a king is a bad idea.
It isn’t. Our head of state is a kind old man while most other countries have some form of psychopath
Do you by chance know how popular the next guy is?
Oh no. A rich person with access to the best medical care in the world is sick. What ever will we do.
i wasn’t aware cancer could get cancer.
Has anyone wished good luck to the cancer yet?
I have… I have also bribed the cancer, and I have also started to write the chant. I am thinking of doing a remix of the catchy Lizzie’s in a box with a Charley’s in a box but leaving the rest the same. I also think once he is gone the guy who got banned from having eggs in public in the UK should be allowed to have eggs agian.
What’s that story about eggs?
To summarize, a man Patrik Thelwell threw an egg in the general direction of Charley, the court ordered a 500 m restraining order (I will agree perfectly reasonable) from Charles and his wife, and the other is he is banned from publicly possessing eggs. That was late 2022, early 2023 he was arrested on suspicion carrying eggs. They also alegedly have counter terrorism following them.
I understand that all in all this is quaint considering what the US would do if for example eggs where thrown in the direction of Joe Biden, Offically the sentence was a year of community service (along with the no eggs and restraining order) but it still seems beyond rediculous. and I would say what the US would do is incredably extreme. The restraining order and Community service would have been sufficent
Bro please go outside, go for a walk or something
Maybe you should go wash your mouth after all the bootlicking.
The guy was born into an anachronistic system where he has had absolute privilege and his family indulged in political interference (a lot to their own benefit) despite claiming to just be impartial figureheads.
Last summer a football player had to campaign to keep free school meals going through the summer so millions of kids in poverty could fucking eat.
So what if some privilege cunt has arse cancer?
Lmfao apparently it’s “bootlicking” to point out a criminally online take. I, for one, don’t think people should be judged based on circumstances out of their control, like where or when they were born. There are plenty of reasons to dislike the dude, like no really there are so god damn many, but him being born into it is not one of them.
I’m not even saying you shouldn’t be pleased to see his death, just that making jokes about the suffering that occurs from cancer is a take so distant from reality of course you’ll only see it online. If you are genuinely pleased by hearing about someone’s cancer diagnosis, you should really do some self evaluation.
If you think him dying from that will purge the UK of the monarchy, I have a bridge to sell you. There are actual things you could do to help end it, the original comment I replied to isn’t one.
born into Key piece of info here. Not like he had a choice, was there?
…zzzzzzzzzzzzz…
