This is a Planteray tasting giftbox, six bottles of different rum, five of which are dedicated to a specific bad person, for when I no longer share the planet with them, I printed ribbons on my label maker with the name of the person the bottle is dedicated to.
Interestingly, out of the five bottles I have dedicated, four of them are dedicated to a person with a “u” as the first or only vowel in their surname.
The current dedication goes out to:
Mr. Trump
Mr. Putin
Mr. Musk
Mr. Murdoch
Mr. Orbán
The fifth is as of yet undedicated, but if you have any suggestions, feel free to post them.
Shit-moths. They started off as tiny, little shit-larva, Randy, and then they grew into shit-apillars. A pandemic of shit-apillards. Everywhere you look, Randy, shit-apillars. They almost drove me over the god damn edge, boy. I tried to exterminate them, I tried to put an end to the shit-apillar’s life cycle, but I failed. And now, shit-moths, Randy. Every fucking one of them, shit-moths.