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Cake day: June 28th, 2023

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  • We went to one of the several trunk or treats in our town. I chose one of the less busy ones so my kid could understand what the massive downtown one would be like if she wanted to do that. We waited in line from trunk to trunk for a whole hour, got meh candy, got to get inside emergency vehicles (that was cool), got to see a lot of other people’s costumes (also really fun), but mostly it was waiting. Standing mostly still. And then the advertised time came for it to be over, even as people were still waiting in line, tables and cars all broke down and started leaving us in a sad, barren lot. We went trick or treating for the main event after all, and got excellent candy, saw all kinds of cool houses as we actively walked with a friend for as long as we wanted.



  • I listen to a podcast by a licensed therapist (Dr Laura Anderson, Sunday School Dropouts) who specializes in helping people recover from religious trauma, and honestly, she does argue that high control religion works a lot like the dynamics of abusive personal relationships. She also notes that when people are used to being shamed/coerced/guilted/etc for religious reasons, they’re more likely to accept abusive behaviors in personal relationships as well–it’s already normal stuff. And most of the arguments I’ve heard in favor of preserving child marriages comes from religious folks asking “what happens when a 15 year old gets pregnant, the baby needs both a father and a mother!” Instead of wanting to use investigation or nuance, child marriages are a quick fix to always complicated situations.




  • I have no argument in general for you, you made good points. But it’s also so, so at odds with all the messaging around teen pregnancy that I remember so clearly growing up. Wait until you can afford it, wait until you have a career, a home, wait until you’re married… From basically 8+, my view of pregnancy was that it fucked up someone’s life.

    But now, governments want their people to go against all that programming for absolutely no reward and more emotional manipulation (worrying about everything that these tiny humans need, worrying about staying alive and productive enough as one of only two people responsible for the tiny humans, etc). Wtf, why?