Our clothes are comfy af

Not if you have curves, unfortunately. You can size up and belt down, but then you’re left with a ton of extra fabric wadded up around your waist and the belt buckle will ride up and pinch.

Why should women have to buy clothes that fit poorly and are uncomfortable just to get functional pockets?

If your kids are playground aged, you probably don’t have a ton of free time/babysitter money to be doing that. You could bring the kids, but I’d rather not have my small children handling used needles and condoms (just a few of the delights I’ve found on my local playground)…