I’ll start by saying that I’d get rid of the need to shit. I’m pretty sure everyone can agree that it’s unpleasant.
Senescence maybe?
I would like to correct the gut-brain connection. 95% of the time our gut tells our brain that it wants something, and it’s trying to say it wants water, but the brain hears that the gut is hungry.
My gut just wants beer right now.
Have an upvote 👍
Shitting feels good… I would just alter it so it doesn’t smell bad, tastes like brownie batter, and isn’t toxic.
Excuse me, I just farted. What the fuck did I just read? 😂🤣
Our dog is named Brownie, I’m not in any hurry to taste his batter.
Anyways, free upvotes for everyone today 👍
Remove the need to exercise, like an anaconda. The ability to just lay around doing nothing and still be ripped to the max. That would be cool!
˙˙˙ǝɹǝɥ uᴉ ƃuᴉɯᴉɥɔ ɐɔᴉɹǝɯ∀ ɥʇnoS
I’d like to urinate from my thumbs at will.
Who is Will, and what did he do?
😂🤣
Surprised nobody’s mentioned adding a 2nd penis yet…
You say that like you never logged into Reddit and saw the pre-Ai pics of the guy.
What ever did happen with the dude that had an artificial replacement penis made on his left arm anyways?
Shit, it looked like it was totally ready for transplant to its final destination, but then COVID lockdown came along and surgery was postponed…
🤷♂️
Some people don’t even have a first penis ☹️
Have an upvote 👍
All genitals have eyes now.
And teeth and a nose and all?
Why did you curse my imagination?
Fuckit, have an upvote 👍
Toenail growth.
Cutting nails is annoying, and toenails are awkward and stupid.
Required to grow so they recover from damage.
Following the spirit of my post, I would assume that toenails would no longer receive damage and would hopefully last through a person’s lifetime.
Side thought, it would be nice if teeth didn’t rot…
Eliminate the need to sleep.
As others have mentioned:
Welcome to 24 hour work days…
Have an upvote regardless 👍
Well you didn’t say for everyone… So maybe he meant just for himself :)
Dangit!
Have an upvote 👍
Can I add wings? I wouldn’t mind being able to fly around!
You can absolutely add wings!
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Yeah not too many people in this thread have considered the “adds” it seems! Do you have an add?
Awesome question!
I would add a stem cell gland to help with healing injuries and stuff.
Whoa you just took it to another level. I think I like yours better!
I would eliminate the ability for humans to reproduce.
Have you SEEN people?
Have you seen a birth? Not fun
Honestly, I have. Not in person though, but on PBS Public Television.
I do not have the parts to experience child birth, but indeed it does not look like a fun experience.
Yeah so my partner gave birth to twins in a c-section.
I also do not have the parts but hoo-boy that was the experience of a lifetime, and not necessarily all fun / happy joyous.
Basically the pregnant person is on the table and they erect a sheet vertically just below her arms. Then dad (me) sits by her head and holds her hand while the magic happens.
It seemed like there was about a dozen people in the theatre, the kids each having their own team of pediatrician and nurses.
It was a complex pregnancy and while everyone is fit and well now the 48 hours following that operation were pretty terrifying.
LMFAO! Touché salesman!
You could pre-empt the need to shit by not having to eat or drink. Honestly, when I lament humanity’s weaknesses I eventually always come back to the fact that we’re creatures in this universe that can only persist if we kill and eat other creatures. How would we be fundamentally changed if that were no longer true?
You could pre-empt the need to shit by not having to eat or drink.
Um, you know that your body expels more than digestion by-products through defecation, right? Where do you think dead blood cells go?
The other “noble ape” shit I’m not touching.
Remove need to sleep. You would get ~33% more time every day.
I can’t wait to work 24 hours a day! No pesky sleep getting in the way anymore.
Sleep’s the only thing stopping you from working 24 hours?
It’s the only thing stopping the people in charge of our society from mandating 16-hour days
We’d just be exploited for our labor 33% more.
needing food. that would free up a lot of time and money, no input = no output. no dishes, no stove or fridge, no need for a dishwasher, then on the other end, no need for TP, or even a toilet!
This was my comment. My dad and I felt that same way but my grandmother just couldn’t understand how we could.
If I never needed to eat, that’d be wonderful. No more getting fat ever again and I’d probably be 100 times healthier.
If you’re still regenerating tissue, your body is still producing weight. Drastically reduced (I’d guess by 75% total, of which 2/3 is dead digestive bacteria you’d no longer need), but still existent.
Fun fact, you don’t defecate out weight loss, either. You exhale carbon in CO2
If I breathe more, would I lose more weight?
This guy thinks so, but you also have to do cold plunges. And is more about converting your fat into a better kind of fat.
I’m just gonna learn from you and fart glitter. I’m pretty sure I can lose weight that way…
I wanted to say allergies, but I am not sure you mean abnormal stuff too.
Breathing otherwise. Annoying + can’t stay underwater for long enough.
Though if add, direct thought + feeling sharing. Current communication is way too inefficient.
Pretty much all answers here should be valid, have an upvote 👍
Another thought, it would be nice if our hair didn’t grow like any longer than an inch or so, where people wouldn’t need regular haircuts or complicated hair styles.
I mean sure, ladies wouldn’t be able to grow their hair out as is fairly common these days, but if our hair always stayed relatively short, it would be perfectly normal, and would save us the hassle of going to the barber.
Or just have the ability to control how fast it grows.
On/off switch
There was a sci-fi book a while back where all humans were gone, and all that was left was a thriving android civilization expanding across the solar system. The main character was built on the base of a sex bot, and had the ability to set the speed of her hair growth, and color. At one point she gets tied to some tracks (a city on Mercury that traveled around the planet) to be eliminated (she was a spy) and ends up getting away by forcing her hair to grow at a rate so fast it came out weak and easy to tear. Super weird book, but I thought of it when I read the comment I was responding to. And yes, on/off was part of it.
