Do we just live and suffer and die?
My cat died April 16th, 2023. Had a few, never have another. Can I share my story? I swear there’s a point at the end.
Adopted her from a local redditor, who had only had her a month. She was always tiny, but at some point, cancer wasted her overnight. By the time I noticed her collar falling off her 1.5" neck it was too late. We found her dead in the hallway the next night.
She sat on my lap every night, and that’s all she wanted, simple affection. I was single and living alone, excepting a friend with benefits across the street, I was terribly alone. She was my solace, my peace. She was my friend, not an animal, not a pet, my friend. And gods how I cried because I felt I had let my dear friend down. Hell, crying now.
“WHY?!”, I screamed. Why was such a blameless and harmless friend dead when I’ve done such evil in life?! I’ve tried to be one of the good guys, but I’ve done bad things. She had no concept of evil, she just was, and only asked for comfort. Call it survivor guilt, guess it is. But a life like hers clearly deserved more life than my tainted soul.
She didn’t do any of the typical cat meme stuff, just kinda hung around. Rarely left the yard, just sat in the shadow of my truck when it was hot, chilled inside when it was cold. Always low energy, but no issues the vet could point to.
Anyway, I buried her out at my personal chunk of swamp in the boonies. Fought for 30 minutes to cut through cypress roots, but I wanted her to rest in a nice shady spot by the water. Literal blood, sweat and tears getting that tiny grave open. Didn’t think anyone would give a shit, but my friends all rolled out. I’m the guy in the cowboy hat. I salute her grave every time I pass.
Mom died 2-weeks ago, on my birthday. I cried for that cat far more than for her. I get you. I feel you. LOL, I’m sure mom cried more for the death of her mountain lions than she would have for me. So it goes.
So yeah, we live and we die. Our friends and family die. Suffering? I dunno. Did my cat suffer? She certainly did for at least some of her life. But she certainly didn’t after I got her. At least she was as happy as I knew how to make her.
Suffering is only possible if you’re alive. Hell, we could be atoms embedded in a Jovian moon, but at least we’re here to feel. And that’s pretty fucking wild if you think about it. I’ve suffered like hell, but I’ve also experienced and loved more than the vast majority of humans ever will. (And if you looked at our pics, the little Asian woman is now my wife. Funny how life works out.) If I died tonight, I’d call it a win. Being alive is a fabulous gift, even though it has its downsides.
How about you tell us about your cat? Your turn OP. Step up and let us have it.
ive had to say goodby to a few pet friends now. i dont regret having my pet friends.
we got to enjoy each others company, and honestly the pet gets the better end of this deal if their people are sound.
the pet gets the better end
The one comforting thing is that my cat probably doesn’t care about leaving as much as I do. He loves sleeping anyway
were all ships passing in the night. a few get to know each other before moving on.
i just got my first dog. i hate dogs. i now only hate all other dogs. and this dog… well, its already bothering me i will have to say goodbye.
but it reminds me of that south park episode
Yes. Maybe enjoy things too. The universe is meaningless and we’re here by accident.
The only question is what to do about it.
Anyway, sorry about your cat. I’m sure it lived as nice a life as possible.
Your cat had a good life and loved you and then died. There doesn’t have to be a point, there’s more good than suffering.
No there isn’t.
My experience has been a net negative and I don’t event have it that bad.
The world does suck right now. All the more reason to find something like a cat or some other thing that makes you happy to help ignore all the bullshit.
I have a cat, two dogs, married, high paying 30 hour a week job, no debt, several good friends, tight family. Still net negative.
I’d ask to switch with you, except I know very well that anyone’s life can be much more complicated than it seems on the surface, and happiness does not automatically come from any of that. Therapy doesn’t help everyone be happier, but it’s something worth trying or trying again.
Life is. Some is suffering, some is great. Altogether it is temporary. Some have argued that the great would be bland without the temporary or the suffering. The resolution to that argument will be clear at the end, or it won’t, and maybe nothing will. So it goes.
By my estimation, in any case the best course of action is to enjoy the great. Perhaps it’s also best to appreciate the great in context of the temporary, and the suffering. It’s macabre, but it’s either poetic, or it’s making the best of a fundamentally macabre situation. So it goes.
The point is to give someone vulnerable a full life, with safety and warmth.
From your perspective, time went by too fast; from their perspective, it was a long and peaceful lifetime, they were incredibly fortunate to have someone like you.Also, there is an implicit assumption we carry around that to be immortal is some sort of blessing or state to aspire to, while it may very well be that being mortal is itself the blessing.
In my opinion, the highest tribute one can pay to a departed friend and companion is to again open one’s home to another vulnerable creature and make him/her family.
Do it in your departed friend’s memory and honor. If you could communicate again with them, you would let them know this is part of their proud and gentle legacy, to reduce suffering on the world - “Look what you did, by being who and what you were for me in life, you opened the door for someone else when their turn came.”
This is what I have done, and do not regret a minute of it.
