Oh it’s worse than that. Or maybe you’re talking about a different one. But the one I remember involved the 4channer absent-mindedly leaving the cum jar with his Rainbow Dash figurine in it on the radiator heating thing and finding said cumjar boiling. He boiled Rainbow Dash in cum.
Add one more adapter to plug that 1/4" into a sound card, plug a printer into the other end, and then hire Abdul Alhazred to write a Cups driver.