Assume that there’s no STIs involved. How comfortable would you be with a partner with numbers in the double digits? Triple digits?
When would be the appropriate time to share that kind of information?
I’m 45. I haven’t kept a count of ‘conquests’ since my early 20s. If a woman knows her number without thinking about it, that tells me a lot about her maturity level and matters way more than the actual number.
It isn’t all. It means she knows what she is doing!
More XP. Higher level. Better rewards.
It smells like reheated puritanism in here… Glad to know the more things change, the more they stay the same.
No, it would not matter to me. I wouldn’t ask, either. People deserve their privacy. But I’m aware of how outdated that concept may sound or be, nowadays. If I got to know, I’d like to know from the start. Because… yes.
The least I’d expect would be for the person to respect me and make sure everything was well and safe, before condoms could be considered to be overlooked. I always made sure to watch my health in regards to others.
I’m aware that for this hypothetical STDs are to be diaregarded but still…
But “body count”? What happened to “sex partners” or “lovers”? Got too clinical or too intimate? I’d like to understand the almost pathological need of lingo nowadays to create distance or sound military. In this case, both at the same time. Let’s dehumanize ourselves a bit more.
Going back to the original question again:
No, it does not matter how many people warmed their sheets or enjoyed their bits. Good for them, got lucky, but I get to keep the prize. Maybe share a bit, if we get a bit more on the wild side.
Let’s raise the stakes. What if the person is/was a sex worker? A prostitute or maybe a porn actor or actress? Does their line of work makes them less worthy of having emotional needs? Less human? Less of a person? Not really. In my understanding they are as deserving, if not even more, of having someone love, respect and support them.
I remember watching this documentary on sex workers years back and how this actress described her need, after a long day of work of being fucked, to go home, have a shower, have a nice meal with her partner and afterwards go to bed and make love in the missionary position. Telling, isn’t it?
And in the extreme scenario of that long line of people stemming from some trauma or perhaps a mental health condition, again, it should not matter at all.
I’m now available for your downvotes and vitriole.
Dated a sex worker - more a ‘call girl’ than a street contractor - after she was out. She got into it like the stereotype: sperm donor split when she got knocked up, and then she was a single mother outta high school with limited skills and massive bills.
Hey, one of us knew what we were doing back then. Yay!
She was absolutely stunning, too.
Not a factor at all, but using the term “body count” is enough on its own to lose interest.
Very mature of you to have an appropriate age bracket of 40+ only
One homicide might be an accident, once someone’s over a dozen I wouldn’t want them in my house.
I suppose it depends if it’s a hobby or a professional gig.
I know for a fact my wife has a higher count than I do, how much more? No clue, because I never asked and it doesn’t matter.
Everything she’s done up until I met her, made her the woman I love today.
Body count is stupid.
As long as someone is honest with you, cares about you, and gotten tested so they aren’t spreading anything… who honestly gives a shit?
If you have a problem with the number of people your partner slept with prior to meeting you, you really shouldn’t be dating, as you need therapy to work through your issues before you start mucking about with other people.
Wow.
So someone likes sex. So do I. We have that in common. Your body count is of no concern of mine. Honestly none of my business who or how many as long as we are together we stay faithful unless previously agreed upon.
None. No number. Why does it matter? Like, at all?
don’t care. I’ve never even asked a woman how many people she’s been with. It’s none of my business.
I have had zero partners, and I think I’d feel really insecure with someone more experienced. Depending on the person it might not be a dealbreaker, as long as it’s not more than maybe 2 or 3. Although I know that is a very small percentage of people my age :(
Thanks for the honesty. I have a hard time figuring out why anyone would care. Insecurity. That’s the answer. If you care you’re insecure.
Sorry you’re struggling with that.
Context not included, the number itself doesn’t matter, but the context with the number can potentially matter. For example if they had sex with 50 people and thought they were in love with most of them, then how can i feel like their love for me is real and going to last? But if they had sex with 1000 people when they were being sex trafficked against their will, then (aside from concerns about possible related trauma) the number wouldn’t matter at all.
What if they had sex with 1000 people willingly and enjoyed it, but weren’t in love with all of those people?
Again, I’d need to know the context. Was the person a sex addict? Were they in a contest with their friend to see who could have sex with the most people? Etc etc etc? 99.99% of people don’t get anywhere near 1000 sex partners, so for me I’d need to know the context that led up to that result
Anything above 5 makes me cautious. Anything above 10 is a hard no.
And no, this is not a double standard, I am below 5 myself
Weak.
