Halp
Quickly, eat a massive bowl of soup and your body will just think you had a huge portion of chowder so you don’t need to feel ashamed.
I’m proud of you!
You’ll be fine in a day or so, but get ready for some extreme bubble gut
This too shall pass 😌
As will gas
The real dangers of marijuana /j
🤣
1/1 chance of eating block of cream checheese 1/10000 chance of crippling psychosis
Hehe checheese.
This is real. Id be so much less fat if i didn’t.
This, but unironically.
Try to compensate with several bagels
More like 2 with the proper amount of cream cheese.
I may or may not have gotten way too into trees and bike repair and thought you were measuring your cheese with precision calipers
Gotta check for shrinkflation
i just weigh it after i eat it
Bro dump some salsa over that and eat it with tortilla chips
Aw fuck, that sounds so good, but alas, I have no salsa :(
No hot sauce in the house? Blasphemy!
RIP toilet
And a sad bum.
Protip: if you know Satan’s Eyeball is coming, you can, uh, line the exit with a barrier ointment called Ilex. Just be careful not to glue it shut (petroleum jelly can help). If you are too late, there’s this great soothing ointment called calmoseptine (it’s desitin with a very mild topical analgesic in it) but it’s pink and stainy so wear a pantyliner with it unless you really don’t like that pair.
Source: former member of the nuclear taco club
Mine eased when I went off gluten and dairy. But that wouldn’t defeat the purpose of this post, seeing as its OP having eaten a bunch of dairy.
Embrace it. Ngl, I do this sober lmao. Not by itself though.
Not by itself though.
Well you see, I had started out toasting pieces of bread for it, but at some point I decided that was taking too long and just started eating it straight LMAO
What a waste of cream cheese. Here use it in this instead
>Checks ingredients
>No buffalo
True, the one fatal flaw
It’s just the standard chicken pasta recipe for buffalos.
Okay, It’s been another five minutes and now I’m even more hungry than I was five minutes ago so now is the time you have to rise and bring forth your squirrel to the… bagel shop. Where I can get the cream cheese the creamy creamy cheese, cheesy cheesy cream.
Whatever you’ve heard about arterial maggots is NOT true.
No help is needed, shits delicious
I hope it was with chips and spicy salsa… as a lactose intolerante, that is what I always miss the most about cream cheese
