• PieMePlenty@lemmy.world
    13·
    17 hours ago

    Maybe it needs a connection cause it takes a picture of your feces and sends it to an AI analysis service. If anomalies are detected, it tells you that you should take the stool sample to a laboratory for further study, then lets you flush. Poof, smart toilet. I could see people with too much money buying this.

    Edit: Thought about it some more… why stop at feces images? Why not also have a high resolution camera pointed at your anus taking crowning shots and analyzing those. Tell users if anythings wrong. The future is bright brown boys. The future is brown.

    Edit2: You could even have motion based security… alert if anyone broke in through your bathroom. Cameras in toilets people! What could go wrong?

    Edit3: Hear me out. User controlled bidet mode + anus camera. Take out your phone and clean your ass in first person. Score points if you clean your whole ass and compete on an online scoreboard. Tech sure is amazing.

  • LovableSidekick@lemmy.worldEnglish
    52·
    1 day ago

    Making “smart” devices that can’t do routine mundane things without an active internet connection is completely fucking stupid.

    • Taleya@aussie.zoneEnglish
      10·
      24 hours ago

      I’m just boggled by the fact that “a toilet you flush with your phone” ever gof off the stoner couch. who the fuck wants to pull out a phone and press a button every time they take a piss.

      Sensors if you move, yeah they’re a thing that’s given us all a surprise shifting our weight but a fucking app???

      • Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world
        2·
        14 hours ago

        who the fuck wants to pull out a phone and press a button every time they take a piss.

        There could be a use case in public restrooms or retirement homes, but a usage sensor and timer would do the job better.

      • JackbyDev@programming.devEnglish
        2·
        17 hours ago

        I mean, obviously a manual handle would be a requirement, but I could possibly see it? Like the idea of an app controlled bidet is not that far fetched because they have a lot of buttons and settings (obviously I want physical buttons too).

      • LovableSidekick@lemmy.worldEnglish
        3·
        20 hours ago

        Yeah I would expect a “smart” toilet to flush when I stood up or moved away. Why anybody would ever require a phone to turn on a faucet is beyond ridiculous.

  • starman2112@sh.itjust.works
    172·
    1 day ago

    Day 3,801 of thanking God I was born a Luddite

    Anyone who thought their toilet would be improved by having an internet connection deserves this

  • contrapunctus@lemmy.cafeEnglish
    511·
    1 day ago

    The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at and repair.

    Douglas Adams

  • kamen@lemmy.worldEnglish
    24·
    1 day ago

    Okay, I get the idea of smart AC for example - be elsewhere, turn it on remotely so that it’s comfortable when you get home. Fine. But a toilet? You are physically present there, you can push a button to flush. Or are you telling me that you’re shitting remotely now too?

    • ameancow@lemmy.worldEnglish
      6·
      1 day ago

      Wait, so you’re not subscribed to shitme™? For a low monthly subscription they send you a sealed, self-addressed and postage-paid container to deposit your feces in, it gets sent to a sorting facility and distributed via drones or delivery drivers directly to your home toilet, where the feces are flushed in the privacy and safety of your own home! The peace-of-mind alone is worth the $39.98 a month. Up until now, the only challenge has been flushing the toilet while you’re still at the office, this way you NEVER have to go home!

    • DerArzt@lemmy.world
      6·
      1 day ago

      you’re shitting remotely now too?

      Do we tell them about the remote shit technology that just landed from Uranus?

      • TeamAssimilation@infosec.pub
        2·
        1 day ago

        It’s not that great anyway. Your local toilet will surreptitiously grab and analyze your poop, dispose of it so you don’t need to flush, and have the remote toilet extrude an identical copy someone else has to flush.

    • TheHotze@lemmy.world
      2·
      1 day ago

      Hands free means you don’t have to touch the handle with dirty hands, but you can do that with a motion sensor too.

    • LastYearsIrritant@sopuli.xyzEnglish
      11·
      1 day ago

      I mean… Electronics and the Internet are also following the laws of physics. But I get what you mean, levers should be the only activation, and gravity should be the only requirement.

      That being said, electronics in our devices do tend to reduce the amount of water and power that appliances use. Dumb devices are extremely inefficient, even though there are fewer points of failure.

      It sucks that a 1950’s fridge can still function just fine today, but it also is a bigger strain on the power grid, and a leak in the refrigerant would destroy the ozone.

      • sugarfoot00@lemmy.caEnglish
        4·
        1 day ago

        > That being said, electronics in our devices do tend to reduce the amount of water and power that appliances use. Dumb devices are extremely inefficient, even though there are fewer points of failure.

        I fail to see how electronics in these (unpowered) devices in any way reduce the amount of power that they use.

      • Lexi Sneptaur@pawb.socialEnglish
        1·
        1 day ago

        Yeah I think the meaning of the above comment boils down to “If it doesn’t have a simple fallback, it can’t be trusted”.

    • ace_of_based@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
      5·
      1 day ago

      You’re already @ the mf toilet too, or the sink. what is even the purported purpose of remotely activating something you have to stand there to use?

    • Phoenicianpirate@lemm.eeEnglish
      3·
      1 day ago

      I can see some purpose in having a ‘smart’ toilet for monitoring health. Your pee and poo can have some value in seeing if there anything that needs to be dealt with medically. But even that is difficult to do. For one thing, it must still function ad a toilet first before anything. Meaning it uses the simple mechanical flushing and refilling and stopping when it is sufficiently full.

      However for this the analysis and storage of data must be 100% at the user’s control. If they want it gone. It is gone. Irrecoverable. Any update must be done via USB or other connection. No wifi or internet.

      And even then the analysis can be off for obvious reasons. People need to scrub their toilets and some keep it clean by having one of those pucks in the tank that sanitize the water. All of these can interfere with any results out of a medical setting.

      • Lv_InSaNe_vL@lemmy.world
        2·
        21 hours ago

        Yeah but if they let users control the data then how are they supposed to sell it to insurance companies to boost their value to VCs???

  • the_riviera_kid@lemmy.worldEnglish
    10·
    1 day ago

    And yet I hear dumbshits bragging all time about how alexa controls my (insert thing that definitely does not need automation here).

    These sort of people never think beyond tomorrow and it shows.

  • SGG@lemmy.worldEnglish
    48·
    2 days ago

    I’ve put a few smart lights/switches/sensors/power points in at home. Definitely helps mum as we can have wireless switches for the lights, and motion sensors to turn the hallway lights on automatically as well.

    For ALL of them, I make sure there is a manual control that will work as a backup regardless. Even if a smart light is “off” due to the motion sensor not detecting movement, all you need to do is turn the old regular light switch off then back on and the light will default to being back on.

    • JohnEdwa@sopuli.xyz
      5·
      1 day ago

      Ye. I have all Ikea smart stuff, by default everything is running a local mesh network with physical remotes and that light switch backup.

      You don’t even need to connect any of it to the net, buying a hub to get app & google home/alexa/etc control is entirely optional with the exception of a few sensors, like the moisture/water leak one. And even then, the app & hub work on local wifi with no internet anyway.

    • Cocopanda@futurology.todayEnglish
      6·
      1 day ago

      Same. I have TOPGREENER power monitors on all my major applications. Tracking kWh usage. Smart bulbs all through out the house and smart speakers located within speaking distance. Plus a hodge podge of cameras doing 24/7 monitoring.

    • NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone
      8·
      2 days ago

      There’s one guy in my department who does all the smart home shit, but I absolutely don’t see the point in it. Didn’t even connect the washing machine to the wi-fi as you can’t set it going without having loaded it first anyway.

      • Captain Aggravated@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        4·
        1 day ago

        I could see having lights on a somewhat sophisticated timer. Like having bedroom lighting that simulates dawn, fades on etc. Maybe making a thermostat a little bit more sophisticated. I’d like to live in a world where I could trust the power company to tell me when electricity is abundant and scarce but we’re gonna have to win Civil War 2 before we get that. My toilet and faucets do not need any digital technology at all.

        • Damage@feddit.it
          1·
          12 hours ago

          I’ve got smart shutters that open and close automatically based on time, smart awnings which lower or raise based on the sun, to allow air flow when the shade isn’t needed, smart lights that can be turned off all together with a button near my door when I leave, movement sensors in a few rooms that turn on the light but only at certain times of the day (essentially I don’t want my corridor light to flash me when I go to the bathroom during the night), energy meters and smart plugs that allow me to optimize my electricity costs.

          It’s not for everyone but it’s quite useful.

    • Korhaka@sopuli.xyzEnglish
      52·
      2 days ago

      The more I hear from big tech companies the more I want to reject it. I don’t even own a printer.

      • rekabis@lemmy.ca
        34·
        2 days ago

        Go for older laser printers. They’re bulletproof, cheap on toner, free of DRM, and even if they only come with an LPT port you can always build your own print server that gives you all the bells and whistles like AirPrint.

        • locuester@lemmy.zipEnglish
          13·
          2 days ago

          Can confirm. I’m a tech worker. No smart devices. Laser printer. Very close to going back to a flip phone.

          I am looking at some smart locks, but they’re able to be used as dumb locks with PIN code and physical key also. And they have a usb power port on the outside you could plug a battery into.

          I’ve gone down the smart home route a decade ago and only did non-cloud integrated devices with physical controls also. But it’s a part time hobby to maintain it.

          • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
            2·
            1 day ago

            usb power port on the outside you could plug a battery into.

            Until someone with a flipper figures out that port transfers data too, lmao.

          • rekabis@lemmy.ca
            5·
            2 days ago

            flip phone

            Almost all such phones are actually smart phones in a flip phone Edgar Suit. Especially if it has maps or YouTube or any kind of an App Store. I see a crapton of flip phones that run Android, which has all sorts of Google spyware piggybacking along.

            I think there may be only two or three dumb flip phones or feature flip phones left on the market, and IIRC two are locked to specific networks.

            If you want a bona-fide dumb phone, you might be limited to something like the rotary un-smartphone.

            • spookex@lemmy.world
              2·
              1 day ago

              I had a Sharp SH-03L for a while, it’s a business version of one of their flip phones that didn’t even have a camera.

              The OS was actually android 8.0 but really stripped down to basically only do the whatever apps a flip phone has.

              I was able to sideload apks through ADB, but ironically, I actually wanted the google stuff to work since a lot of the apps required it to log in and other things.

              The thing was pretty cheap though, paid like $15 for it

            • Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.comEnglish
              3·
              2 days ago

              Go check in Aliexpress: there are tons of non-smart phones, especially the stuff marked as “senior phone”, and they’re pretty cheap too (like $15 for a mobile phone that just does calls and SMS).

              If you want the stuff that’s not glitzy and heavy on marketing you need to get it from where the factories are, not were the brands are - basic mobile phone tech is a thoroughly solved problem and highly integrated nowadays and well within range for even smallish electronics manufacturers to design themselves.

              Also check HMD, the Finnish mobile maker who bought Nokia’s mobile business, who also have several non-smart models (including old Nokia models).

              Edit: No idea if any are flip-phones though. Here’s an example flip phone

        • uis@lemm.ee
          81·
          2 days ago

          build your own print server that gives you all the bells and whistles like AirPrint.

          …why? CUPS is print server. You don’t need anything else.

          • YesButActuallyMaybe@lemmy.ca
            15·
            2 days ago

            Because they are like two fifty on the flea market and will run on one cartridge for 10 years. I print all my tickets everytime, I’m that old

          • bane_killgrind@slrpnk.netEnglish
            9·
            2 days ago

            literally so you can leave it unplugged in a box, and drag it out once a year to print a tax form or something. Toner should be shelf stable.

              • PNW clouds@infosec.pub
                3·
                1 day ago

                I have a 70+ year old friend that paper files. She doesn’t trust the free file places available here (USA). I don’t blame her.

                Ysk - You can order the forms for free on the IRS (& state) websites.

                I print things for her on my 1999 laser jet if she needs something printed.

                Many years I paper filed just to inconvenience them slightly for not offering free file.

                • Korhaka@sopuli.xyzEnglish
                  3·
                  1 day ago

                  I am British, most people don’t need to even think about taxes here as its all automatic. Only really something you might need to look at if you are self employed or its your job to deal with it.

    • rekabis@lemmy.ca
      25·
      2 days ago

      About 3-4 years ago I took a bit of a dive into the firmware of IoT devices. The utter lack of security and the amount of information being hoovered up to the mothership made me swear to never build anything “smart” into the renovations of my current home. Sure, there will be automation. There will be CCTV. There will be solar with battery backup for essentials. There will be conveniences of all kinds. But virtually all will be air gapped, incapable of remote rooting, and under my full control.

      Hell, even my laser printers are HP models over two decades old - an HP 4050DTN and an HP 5000DTN - that are totally devoid of any DRM or “smart features” and can trivially take generic overstuffed cartridges that can do 20,000 sheets at 5% coverage.

      • Damage@feddit.it
        1·
        12 hours ago

        ZigBee and Z-wave create their own network not connected to the internet, pair that with Home Assistant 🇪🇺 and done, sane smart home implementation.

        • rekabis@lemmy.ca
          1·
          5 hours ago

          Will have to look into that, thanks.

          One of my key implementation requirements, however, will be resiliency, which means simplicity will be a core feature. The more “moving parts”, the easier it will be to break.

      • LeninOnAPrayer@lemm.eeEnglish
        14·
        2 days ago

        I worked for Cisco during the time IoT was being pushed into everything. You don’t want to know how bad it is. If I was malicious I could have easily written several backdoors into their products without anyone knowing. I wrote kernel code in their IOS operating system. There are no checks on that shit and the entire switching team does next to zero peer review on kernel security.

        Yes, there products that (at the time) touched upwards of 95% of all packets sent over the Internet.

      • MonkeMischief@lemmy.today
        4·
        2 days ago

        The only upside to this state of things is that it keeps alive my fantasies of one day being a Watchdogs-style techno-sorcerer that can wirelessly hack anything that runs on electrons and a WiFi signal.

        … Although the nightmare is that people far more evil can probably already do that.

      • Milk_Sheikh@lemm.ee
        23·
        2 days ago

        FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS

        I will bulk purchase grey-market bootleg toner from shady overseas websites before I go back to a inkjet…

      • PNW clouds@infosec.pub
        2·
        1 day ago

        Is there a community for those of us with late 90s early 2000 HP laserjets? Somewhere we can discuss maintenance, feeding, and overall care?

        • Lv_InSaNe_vL@lemmy.world
          2·
          20 hours ago

          There used to be but the moderators forgot to sign up for HP Smart® Instant Ink™ and used non-authorized ink (first party ink ordered directly from HPs website) so it got shut down 😔